Tag Archives: Peaceful

'You stupid woman !'

Last week I made a mistake. I stood in front of a group of people I really wanted to give a positive boost, but for some reason it did not work quite well. I had written down what I wanted to say, but had apparently chosen the wrong words and instead of the planned boost, it remained silent. My words were even completely misinterpreted.

Okay. Big blooper. When I got back to my chair I looked at my note. How could this go wrong? For a minute I got the feeling of failure and self conviction. Thoughts like 'O no, I have failed.' and words like René's (from the British comedy series "'Allo' Allo") 'You stupid woman!'

And that is why I can listen so well...

About every week I have an encounter with someone who has managed to produce a diamond from a lemon. A few weeks ago during OpenCoffee Leidsche Rijn I got introduced to a friendly woman with a warm affection.

We shake hands and after a few minutes talking, I confirm what she sees. Namely, that I have a deaf left ear. “I see it in the way you hold your head’, Jorien smiles. “You occasionally put your hand behind your right ear to hear better. And you look very directly into people’s face. “Very well seen!

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Life can sometimes be very unfair. Quite incomprehensible. It is always sad when someone dies, but if that someone is old and tired, than that can be a consolation for the family. “Grandpa has had a good life, I’m going to miss him.”

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One of the many causes of getting stuck in your life or in a situation is when you experience regret.

  • If only I had done…
  • If only I had said…
  • I wish I just walked away
  • I'm such a dork that I am in this situation
  • etcetera…

It can be crippling and even take massive forms, because we are taught that it is better to live without regret. But why is that?

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That is what my coach said some time ago. And years back, when that was said to me, I always felt inadequate. But when Brigitte told me this, a long lasting burden finally fell off my shoulders !

Not being able to perform in a team is no shame … it's just not who I am: an introvert. Yahoo!

Susan Cain – an introvert – describes beautifully the power of introverts. Enjoy!

Does your heart need a boost? So you can hear it better?